i need a helmet

"Is that a Fender Stratocaster in your pants...

alexbalk:

or do you just have a cock shaped like a classic American electric guitar?”

show me the free money

Just deposited my first unemployment check which was followed by a frenzy of job aquiring activity. It’s like the guilt of a mother I swear. “Here is your free money you mooching son-of-a-bitch, shouldn’t you be doing something about the fact you need this.” Then again I have always had hardcore guilt about asking for financial help from anyone. Sometimes I wish I could just be one of those people who guilt their parents into taking care of everything they need money-wise. But I can’t bring myself to do it (well OK so I do maybe sorta kinda use it with my Dad…ok…I admit it…but not as bad as my brother does so THERE).

Anyway in all of this I have started revisiting the idea of freelancing full-time. I’m not so stoked about having to constantly look for jobs but I am getting quite used to not having to deal face to face with all the fucktards of the world. I mean sure I’ll have to work harder with less security possibly for less money for a while…but in the end I have more control over when and how much I work with in reason. No more “how the fuck am I going to take off time for my dream vacation cross country drives?” and that would be nice. But no insurance sounds like a bad idea. 

I’m not used to having this much choice…it’s scary.  

Just saw a meathead frat

Just saw a meathead frat boy get all kinds of amped up in anticpation of a keyboard solo. i don’t know what to think of that.

Stacy gets back to nature via rock and roll

I’m wierd about music. I listen to one band obsessively almost constantly until I find the next band that I listen to obsessively almost constantly. The most recent turnover was from Arcade Fire to the new champion of the last 2 months…Yeasayer. Yeasayer makes me wanna go tribal or something. I want a fire I want to dance barefoot and chant to gods long forgotten. I want a loin cloth (and whatever you call a cloth that covers the tits…I’m a modest heathen) I want to paint my body I want to vision quest. That is what Yeasayer does for me. And my my neighbors (ahem Marty) please forgive me for the fact that you have to also listen to the same album over and OVER AND OVER.

2080 makes me swell up with happiness until I almost burst. And if I should burst I’d be so happy that my body goo would likely turn into candy, rainbows and unicorns made of semi-firm pungent cheese (someone save one of those for Kate please). 

“We will pickle the pain into blue ribbon winners in county contests” 

a countdown to hornytown

It’s 2:30 and i’m still in sweats. I have dinner plans at 5:30. I need to put on clothes and straighten the apt. Yet I feel the sweet sweet apathy of not having a job settling in. So tomorrow I’m setting an alarm and officially getting on it. Like I said I would. Though I said that before deciding to go pro with the boozing again. Last night was a special occasion with special ladies though so I’m not going to hold that against me. Never have little tiny paninis tasted so heavenly. The experience made so much better by quite a bit of wine and the announcement of a recently turned 30 friend that she “swears to God that since she turned 30 she has become horny all the time”. I told that to Häas and I think he is probably setting up one of those websites like people set up for underage girls turning legal except his will be more “3 months, 9 days, and 1 hour and approx. 24 minutes until my girlfriend will jump my bones on a regular basis.”

For some reason my mind has just wandered to the point when Paris Hilton first made a blip on my radar. No real explaination of that. And no interesting antictdote about it. Why would my brain choose to think about Paris Hilton…I mean it’s not 2006 anymore there is no reason to think about her.

forgot really the most important perk

No more waking up in the morning and segueing straight into hysterical sobbing mental break down mode over the thought of going into that hellhole.

That you just can’t beat with a dutch elm diseased stick. 

Back to my wine and logo thumbnailing.

can't say there aren't perks

Things I have already found that I like about not having a job:

1) PJs as a viable clothing option. (yeah you hear it alot but seriously I can go to the bodega or downstairs for slice in them even, why wear “street clothes” again…besides to go to the bar)

2) as luck would have it my period started in full force today (too much info I know, I know) but can I tell you cramps at home in drawstring PJ pants while listening to happy music is far superior to cramps at work with stockings and uncomfortable dresswear and being yelled at by psychotic bitches in too short pants and grandma shirts

3) it’s 4:30…I think I’ll have a glass of wine

4) I walked to get a falafel for lunch and a scone for a snack then I walked to the art supply store for my “thumbnailing” supplies. General during the day walking is nice though it makes me wonder if everyone else I see is unemployed too.

5) Time with the BF. Most couples would kill each other if they for all intents and purposes lived together and then ended up spending all day together too. But since he has the random work schedule of a photographer/photographer’s asst/digital asst/bartender we have spent much of my time unemployed sitting in my apt in separate rooms on our computers and I know to most people that seems wierd but to me it’s very comfortable/comforting.

6) Oh my god I finally get to work on my personal projects…like the screenprinting stuff I wanted to do and this musician/band creative services company I came up with, and matting and framing stuff for my walls, and cleaning. CLEANING!!!

7) I actually talk more to my work friends (ex work that is) during the day than I got to while actually in the office.